I wanna go to a place

I wanna to a place where I can say
That I'm all right and I'm staying there with you
I wanna know if there could be anyway
That there's no fight, and I'm safe and sound with you

And everytime I look,
I thought you were there,
But it was just my imagination
I don't see it anymore cause I see thru you now

Even now you still haven't noticed this quiet sky
I am always thinking of it, but I can no longer return to there

And I will always be awake in my heart, gently taking notice
That someday I will be able to see kindness

What's stopping me? I get stuck again
Is it really OK? It's never OK for me
What's got into me? I get lost again
Is it really OK? It's never going to be

And I will search harder to realize the things in front of my eyes
Even the wind's direction will surely change tomorrow
The wind whispers gently, the one that moves is the earth
Find the way and I will be able to see kindness

And every time I look,
I thought you were there,
But it was just my imagination
I don't see it anymore cause I see thru you now

I wanna go to a place where I can say
That I'm all right and I'm staying there with you

My heart will go on

Haha. So sudden my heart can feel already. It's already heart broken for many times but now i can feel already. Really wish to start to find life partner but somehow i dont dare to love. Everytimes seems to be fake feeling therefore even now i got feeling on someone, i dont dare to confess. My colleague got encourage me to do whatever I wish to do because life is short and we never know what will happen tomorrow. His words is truth. We never know when our life on earth end. We never know when God will take us go home. Time is near and we should appreciate everyday, everytime we have with one another. My desire to have life partner very strong, but i really dont dare to confess. Maybe she might not be the one God chosen for me. What i can do now is to keep my heart go on and let God lead me.

Some how i still thinking of giving up my life as a Christian because I really lazy to do things and i dont have the capability to make disciples. Im still questioning myself whether who am I and what i should do as a Christian. Even someone got say im sure God choose me to be his children and i also learn from the bible study and know the answer yet im still dump and questioning about my faith. I really long time didnt stop and think. I hope that my heart will go on.

I just think of this words (actually i dont remember the chapter and verse no (T_T)) while im writing this blog

Phi 3:13-14
Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead. I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

I do hope that i can keep on going to win the prize.